Thursday, July 8, 2010

"Broke ass ballin"

We were talking today, just us girls around the dining room table. About guys and marriage. Somehow it seems to come up a lot lately, even though half of us still have never managed to keep that relationship thing.

We're Asian-American, our parents were refugees from Cambodia and Vietnam, after the war. They came here, made a life for themselves from the ground up, and have managed to provide a fairly comfortable standard of living for their children. And to their astonishment, we're now grown, pursuing dreams based on this pursuit of happiness and not necessarily on the worth of a dollar. Because they've provided us with this life, where we never really had to worry about money.

So in matters of marriage, we tossed around hypotheticals.

Is not having a college degree a deal breaker?

How much money is enough?

Does money really matter?

Because the thing is, we can't realistically fall back on our parents forever. That crutch won't be there forever.

I don't really know the answers to these questions. When it comes to matters of the heart, I'd say, none of it matters. You adjust, you know. But maybe, it's just easy for us to say that because we've never really had it all that hard.

I was in my car the other day, thinking, trying to remember this theory me and another friend had semi-concocted. We're all highly educated females and fairly driven at that, yet the men we often were attracted to, tended to be of the not-so-educated sort. I couldn't recall what we came up with that would make sense. I've never been into 'driven' guys, perhaps because I'm already that way. I was always into the laid back ones, the ones who were naturally intellectual and never had to try that hard. I thought that was key, not having to try that hard and still somehow able to make it.

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